moveD on..stOpped by..and movIng on agaiN - it's just the way life worKs

it's one of those days when i feel like i'm dreaming and everything regardless of how i'm feeling just go on as they normally do..they don't stop...they nv do anyway..like when i finished national service and the sudden change back to my life at home was a bit dramatic..no more waking up at five..no more physical trainings and classes...and most importantly no more seeing my buddies in ns everyday..it's the end and you just have to move on...but before i could mentally move on..i missed the life there badly..yes even the boring classes..unless i get myself very busy...i will still think a lot bout it...and now i'm feeling exactly the same...it's been both shockingly fast and long at the same time, a levels...life in coll...and when my friend told me after my last paper on friday that this is finally the formal end of our a levels, i still din absorb the fact cuz i was basically TOO absorbed with the damn DAMN econs paper..but now i really do...i keep thinking things that happened in coll+hostel this one and a half year...the orientation day..the first class( it's sheila's class!) ..prom...class trips...hostel life..but if i were to move out of hostel now the effect of the aftermath will definitely be greater...
coll life has been an interesting journey...know loads of new friends..gain lots academically( obviously ).. try new things..perception much wider now...and i think i've grown up and matured more as well...knowing more about people and how to deal with them...and know how to control my FINANCES better...cuz staying outside really makes u budget better(and a bit more stingy as well hehe)....but one sad thing bout coll was that i din really get to do a lot of sports...thus in that sense i still very much prefer my life in secondary school...

feel like ending the post with something motivating ;-)

NEVER GIVE UP
stick to the fight when you're hardest hit - it's when things seem worst that you musnt quit

Little minds are tamed and subdued by misfortune:
but great minds rise above them

REVIEW YOU PLANS
when obstacles arise, change your direction to reach your goal, not the decision to get there

A gem cannot be polished without friction, nor man perfected without trials

BELIEVING IN YOUR SELF
always remember that your own resolution to succceed is more important than anything else-abraham lincoln

A well-known speaker started off his seminar by holding up a $20.00 bill.

In the room of 200, he asked,

"Who would like this $20 bill?"

Hands started going up.

He said, "I am going to give this $20 to one of you but first, let me do this.

He proceeded to crumple up the $20 dollar bill.

He then asked,

"Who still wants it?"

Still the hands were up in the air.

Well, he replied,

"What if I do this?"

And he dropped it on the ground and started to grind it into the floor with his shoe.

He picked it up, now crumpled and dirty.

"Now, who still wants it?"

Still the hands went into the air.

My friends, we have all learned a very valuable lesson.

No matter what I did to the money,

you still wanted it because it did not decrease in value.

It was still worth $20.

Many times in our lives,

we are dropped, crumpled, and ground into the dirt

by the decisions we make

and the circumstances that come our way.

We feel as though we are worthless.

But no matter what has happened or what will happen,

you will never lose your value.

Dirty or clean,

crumpled or finely creased,

you are still priceless to those who DO LOVE you.

The worth of our lives comes not in what we do or who we know,

but by WHO WE ARE and WHOSE WE ARE.

You are special - Don't EVER forget it.

"Count your blessings, not your problems. "

LoNg dAy

it's been a really really long day today...went to the GIC scholarships interview in malacca which means that i got up around four thirty and left klang at five thirty sharp..slept through most of the journey..and was so freaking tired that i got to grab a choc bar before i went to the hotel..felt so much better after that...god chocolate really does miracle to me man...
It started off with an introductory talk by the personnel dept director himself, which i found very informative...now i can understand why they can accept having freshies from engineering courses working in the financial field...a totally unrelated field from what they've been exposed in uni's...cuz in the end it's how fast the mind works and responds that really matter...especially when we're talking bout the volatile financial mkts...so having other degrees like engineering or computer science is actually an extra edge because you'll have the extra technical knowledge besides the ability to analyse things, which such graduates can do very well....so my advice to ppl still deciding on a course...sciences are still better and take you further..unless you really hate sciences or you are really confident in say, reading law or architecture, taking a science course is arguably the safest ( especially engineering)...
So the whole process of testing the candidates was quite thoroughly done..each will have two interviews and four tests...verbal and numerical tests was horribly done basically...i was guessing most of the time and i couldn't finish so i just ticked the answer randomly( 60 questions in 30 minutes for each paper)...personality test was fine..something like those quizzes u can get online to define yourself..then the last one wasn't really a test...we were to write a paragraph of less than 100 words in 5 minutes about erm...can't remember the exact question but it's something like EQ is more important than IQ....and one new thing that i discover today is that i can actually crap A LOT....haha...and it was fun crapping cuz you won't get all up tight..but of course the rate of crapping and the rate of impressing the interviewer are always negatively correlated...haha...
though tiring it was fun and worth the trip down to malacca...saw my junior from convent pei shan ..then made a couple of new friends...to wrap it all, an interesting day it was.... and now looks like my plan to study m2 tonight will have to wait...a full recharge is badly in need now...chiaoz~~

ToRn bY strING of THORNS

eXACtly like when i revisited the website to confirm my unsuccessful application for jpa scholarship, i did the same for my oxford application...but the subtle difference with this time round is that it hit me way harder...i was much calmer when i reconfirm the news at ucas and did a little thinking why was the news so hard to stomach...and i figured out...at least i think i did....well asean scholarship was some sort of recognition that i can tolerate with insane level of stress and 'kiasusm' and therefore it was my prior goal back in secondary school to be able to blend myself in those scary junior colleges in spore....and failing the application did hit me quite hard as it was a 'long-term goal' and securing a merit award wasn't something i wanted (merit awards only includes the tuition fees)..so moving on...next was jpa scholarships and bank negara scholarships... was quite sad about not getting jpa after the interview but bank negara was some kinda try-luck thingy so it wasn't too bad...then there was jardine scholarships...which i didn't manage to get through to the second interview..but even if i did i wouldn't be entitled to it then cuz i'm not accepted to oxford now...ok..so the main point was why was the latest failure the worst of all? first, because it wasn't a scholarhip...it was an application to a higher education institution and that's very different..so failing that means u can't study there whereas the thing with scholarship is that you may still be able to study there but you will then need to fritter away your own precious funds...secondly, also the more important point, is that i really love maths...and yes you heard me maths, i love you!! sounds like a maniac but that's the plain truth...it really does mean a lot to a person when he/she is being appreciated or recognised for something and that something is truly his/her passion...seriously it really does...without fail i can always find a niche of my own doing maths and not to mention the inherent ecstatic feeling i get when i solved mind-boggling maths questions..i worked hard for maths and i willingly did so and thus the perfect reward for me is to be recognised and to continue my passion in a highly regarded institution for the subject i love...so being rejected by oxford IS really something to me...i am sad of course with the repetitive dashing of hopes but this time round it reveals so palpably how important maths is to me and to excel in it ...well at least now i know that i am so right about choosing a mathematical course...

and yes as usual i'll grieve for sometime and bearing in mind the words of console by my loved ones.......

I would have failed ;-)

sTudYing HaRd

great. JUST GREAT.


I couldn't go to the Malaysian Open (Proton Malaysia Super Series) last year cuz it's way too far.


This year it's at SBKL Cheras :-)


and i am grounded.


damn DAMN the exams :(



ps: for those who're interested, the tourney draws is available here ;-)

http://www.internationalbadminton.org/draws.asp